So That’s Why My Nipples Are On Fire….

In my Night Weaning post, I said I would explain why I had so much nipple pain in a later post. First of all, no, I’m not pregnant (sorry family and friends who thought that). Nipple pain and even nursing aversion is very common during pregnancy though, but not my issue. My issue is one I’ve had my whole life and is only getting worse as I get older: Raynaud’s Phenomenon. In a nutshell, I have frequent poor circulation in my extremities. It causes my fingers, hands, feet and toes to get very cold and change color. People touch my hands all the time and go, “AH! YOU’RE FREEZING!” and I just shrug. I am so used to it that I don’t notice it that much anymore. It can be painful as times, but mostly it’s just freaks out other people when I have blue fingers. It never dawned on me that it could effect breastfeeding.

Jack latched himself on my breast for the first time with no trouble at all, but he latched incorrectly. It was pretty painful, but I was so overwhelmed with everything I just let him suck away. The next day (and two very badly lacerated nipples) later, a lactation consultant came to my postpartum room and corrected it all. It was so much better, but at the point he injured me so bad it was still pretty painful. But I pushed on. Pumped if I needed a break but never gave up on latching him, no matter how much it hurt. My nipples healed very slowly, slow enough that my doctor was getting concerned. But they did heal and I didn’t think too much of it. My mom told me breastfeeding hurt for her and other women in my family, so I just accepted that it was my genetics.

Every once and awhile it would still hurt when Jack nursed. I get this weird tingling/burning sensation in my breasts and my nipples turn white. But it wasn’t that bad, so I just kept ignoring it. I assumed he had a shallow latch or maybe a minor tongue tie. I joined La Leche League and got to meet other moms with nipple pain problems. Most of babies did have a tongue or lip tie, but what the moms described didn’t sound like my pain. They said it felt like a tiny clamp on their nipple. Never felt like that for me. And we had no other signs of tongue or lip tie.

As time went on, the pain would come and go. Some days it would be unbearable and then nothing for days. Still didn’t think too much of it. Then one day my friend post a link on Facebook called “That Latch Looks Great! Really?!?! Tell That To My Burning Nipples!” from the Milk Meg. And there it was, number seven on the list of causes common nipple pain:

“Raynaud’s Syndrome! This is when a woman will experience vasospasm in her nipple. Women will actually notice their nipples turning from white to blue or red. This will happen immediately after a breastfeed and is not helped with correcting the latch. It is related to temperature changes on the nipple after the feed and can be exacerbated when a woman has nipple damage.”

Mind blown. My nipple pain is from stupid Raynaud’s! So I did more research and my mind was blown even more. This is why it took so long for my nipples to heal when Jack first bruised them. This is why it hurt even though Jack had a wonderful latch. This why it felt like my boobs were on fire sometimes after Jack nursed. When I was having a bad Raynaud’s day, my pain would be worse. It all made sense now. This is just a minor disorder and I wasn’t in that much pain, so I didn’t did do too much to change it. Now I try to keep warm, stay relaxed, and apply nipple ointment after nursing if possible. It was just nice to know the reason why it hurts.

Then we moved to Oregon, which was very stressful. We had to help Jack settled in to his new routine, which was stressful. And the temperature kept going from cold to hot when we first arrived, making it hard for me to figure how to stay the right temperate. Also, Jack went through a big mental leap and growth spurt during this time. He needed lots of milk and wasn’t sleeping well. No sleep+too cold+stress+constant nursing= nipple pain city! It’s worse at night because of not sleeping well. No problems during the day, he could be latched all day and I wouldn’t mind. But at night my hands are like icicles and I want to cry when Jack is done nursing. Things are settling down so it’s getting better. And the night weaning is also going well and hasn’t been too stressful on anyone. Overall, I am glad I know what’s causing my pain and what I can do it make it better.

I want to share this story to encourage other moms to not just ignore nipple pain. Of course check your baby’s latch first, it’s fairly common culprit. If that isn’t the issue, then consider an underlying condition. Breastfeeding should be comfortable for both you and the baby. Just because you heard that magic phrase, “That latch is perfect!” doesn’t mean you should ignore pain. I am lucky that my condition is minor and I can get through it. If you are in a lot of pain and struggling, don’t just brush it off. Talk to Le Leche League, talk to a lactation consultant, or even talk to a doctor. You can figure it out and get through it! You just need some help and understanding.

Resources:

Vasospasm and Raynaud’s Phenomenon, BreastFeeding Inc.

Raynaud’s Phenomenon Of The Nipple: A Treatable Cause of Painful Breastfeeding, American Academy Of Pediatrics

Seeking Relief, La Leche League

Brownie Energy Balls

Every Friday this summer, Jack and I will be leading a hike with Hike It Baby. Since toddlers (and mamas) get hungry when working up a sweat, I decided to make treats to take with us. This week I made a variation of the recipe I came across called Five Ingredient Ginger Brownies. I changed the recipe based on what I had in the house and what Jack likes. The peanut butter and almonds are great protein and energy. The ginger gives it a little zing for a pick-me-up. And who doesn’t love a bit of good dark chocolate!

Brownie Energy Balls

7 ounces of pitted dates

2 tbs almond flour

2 tbs smooth peanut butter

1 tps minced ginger

2 tbs cocoa powder

Unsweetened shredded coconut

Blend everything but the coconut in a food processor until it comes together. It will make loose dough ball when ready.

Roll into any size ball you desire. I went with bite size.

Sprinkle as much shredded as you like onto a plate. Roll the balls in the coconut to coat.

Eat them now or place in fridge for a hour if you want them firmer.

Pop them in a bag and enjoy them out on the trail! Or your couch….no one will know 🙂

Why I’m Night Weaning My Toddler

I’ve already posted about all the initial struggles with breastfeeding. How I just set in my mind I was going to breastfeed and pushed through all the it all. As of this post, we have made it 14 months of nursing on demand. Whenever and wherever, I tried my hardest to give my baby milk whenever he asked. This meant learning to walk while nursing a carrier, waking up several times a night and pumping when I was away. It was not easy, it was a seriously commit it. But I wouldn’t change it for the word. It’s created a strong and secure bond between my son and me. He looks at me with such love and joy when he nurses—even when he was newborn. One day he will grow up and leave me, but I will always have those memories.

Wouldn’t go back and change this for the world!

No regrets about my sleepless nights (and if you read my sleep regression posts, there were A LOT of them). I understood that having a baby meant his need come before mine most of the time. I knew it was only temporary. One day he would no longer want to suckle all night in my arms. One day he will have his own bed and I could sleep a solid 8 hours again. I just needed to get through it with love and understanding. There were nights were I cried out of frustration. There were nights my husband had to take over because I was reaching a breaking point. There were many days I just had to power through and smile despite exhaustion. But I did it, I survived. I did everything I could to help my son sleep the best and get the best nutrition for the first 14 months of his life.

However, the reason I am writing this post is because I came to a realization. In La Leche League, breastfeeding is described as a mutual relationship between a mother and baby. Mutual as in your are both agree to the terms and are happy with the process. I am no longer happy with the sleepless nights. I am ready to night wean him. This was not an easy decision. I have been talking about the idea for several months now and asking for advice. I was trying to push it off because I didn’t think Jack was ready. I follow gentle parenting, and I didn’t want to force Jack to do something he truly wasn’t ready for (physically or mentally). I talked to my husband about it, who pointed out that Jack can sleep through the most of the night—he does so about once a week on a good week. Then I realized the days after he does, I am so much happier. I take him places to have fun. I have more patience for his almost daily toddler meltdowns over nothing. I even take time to do things for myself like work on my blog or take relaxing bath.

This is mom I like to be. The mom Jack deserves.

Then I began to think about the phrase “Ain’t no body’s happy if mama ain’t happy.” And realized I needed to think about my self this time. So I talked to myself about what I needed to be happy. It was simple, sleep. I was exhausted from not getting consistent sleep first of all. But I also confessed something else to myself, I was in pain. Night nursing was becoming very painful (I will address why in a later post). I had just been ignoring it, but it was starting to make me resentful of son at night. My nipples would be on fire after he nursed, so much that I was automatically not offering him my breast when he first stirred from sleep. I will think, “Please don’t want milk, please don’t want milk, anything but milk!” But then he nurses, it hurts, and I lay there for at least a half an hour waiting for the pain to go away. Then I fall back asleep for a a few hours at the most, and it starts all over again. I wake up in the morning very resentful. The last part is a fairly recent development, I never used to be resentful over it. I have no idea why the past month or so this has come up, but it has. And ignoring it is not helping anyone. I deserve to be happy. Jack deserves a happy mom who doesn’t resent him. And Michael deserves a happy wife. It’s time for mama and everyone to be happy.

He loves his milkies, he is not giving them up easily (and I don’t want him fully to either!)

So I Googled and looked up on Pinterest “Night Weaning”. I found stuff like “How to night wean in 3 nights!” and “Night Weaning Made Easy!”. They all seemed too good to be true. And most were. One mom seriously advocated for shutting the bedroom door and letting them cry-it-out no matter what (including if they vomit out of stress). Not this family’s style. One said she just told her toddler no more milk at night and that was that! Yeah, Jack would never go for that (I even asked him if he could be a big boy and not have milk at night, he gave me a dirty look). One said just drop a feeding each night for a week and that’s it! Others did things like don’t readily offer your breast, drop feedings one-by-one every two weeks, and have dad do all the comforting until the baby no longer wakes up. All those sound good, but I know my son, he won’t take to that much change so quickly.

I also talked to my previous La Leche League group from the Bay Area online and attending my local group’s meetings They offered various anecdotal advice like trying a pacifier or a bottle of water instead. The leaders suggested I try to figure out why he is waking up—like he is hungry, thirsty, having bad dreams, teething, or too cold/hot. If I solved that issue, then maybe he would sleep through the night. They also said I should ask myself if I truly think it’s the best decision for my family and to make sure I am not giving into societal pressure. I thought long a hard about that—like a whole month long. After one night where Jack woke up 10 times (yes, 10!) and he was a major grouch the next day, I knew we all needed better quality sleep.

"This was taken at 3 AM, the 7th wake-up of the night" — “This was taken at 3 AM, the 7th wake-up of the night”

Once I established that we needed more quality sleep, I came up with a reasonable and gentle way to get it. I do not want to fully wean him, like I said I have no problems with nursing during the day. Jack needs to learn how to put himself back to sleep without nursing. I decided to put all the advice I received into a plan according to what made sense to me. I knew he would not tolerate being cut off cold turkey. But I could start by nursing him to sleepy, then unlatching him and rubbing his back until he falls asleep. Once he okay with that, I could try dropping one feeding. So the first time he wakes up at night, rubbing his back to sleep again. Next dropping another feeding in the same way. Then another feeding. And so on. Eventually we get to no milk until the sun rises the next morning. He understands what I said for the most part now, so I will say phrases like “Night night time” and “the sleepies soon”. I will give him clear instructions so he knows what will happen, “You can have some milk, then it we will lay down together and relax. I will rub your back until you go to sleep.” Most importantly, I will explain everything to him. This is a big change, he deserves to know what is going on and why we are doing it. I will also try to ask him what he needs if he can’t go back to sleep easily. Like are you hungry or thirsty? Maybe he needs milk for another reason like the Le Leche League leaders suggested.

Michael giving Jack kisses to and snuggles before bed.

We are on night five of this plan. It’s too early to give a fair assessment, I will update more later. However, I will offer some resources we are using to help the whole family adjust through this process.

Nursies When the Sun Shines— A children’s book that explains how they get to nurse when the sun is shining, but get snuggles and love at night. That way they learn with visuals in a calm, happy setting. I read it to Jack before we go to bed.
Sweet Sleep— An awesome book from La Leche League that explains the science behind baby sleep, as well as how to work with your family’s natural tendencies to help everyone sleep well.
Nighttime Parenting: How To Get Your Baby and Child To Sleep— Dr. Sear’s in-depth explanation of how attachment parenting helps create a secure, loving environment that encourages good sleep.
No-Cry Sleep Solution— I talked about this book more in my 9 Month Sleep Regression post, and it’s still helping now. I got the idea of making a concrete plan from this book. It also has many suggestions on how to end the suck-to-sleep association. And when it is reasonable to night wean.
Essential Oils—I have been using some calming oils to help Jack relax when he gets overtired and to help me calm when I get frustrated. Do some research, they work!

TVP Pulled Pork Sandwiches

What do you when your whole family wants pulled pork sandwiches and you’re vegan? Pull out for textured vegetable protein (TVP) and veganaise! A lovely dinner to welcome the start of summer, which is right around the corner.

This recipe is super easy. Can be pulled together in minutes—way easier than making pulled pork! But it tastes just as good as if it had been cooked hours and hours.

This recipes makes 4 sandwiches.

TVP Pulled Pork Sandwiches
 1 cup Textured Vegetable Protein
 7/8 cup of boiling water
 1 medium onion, diced
 1/2 cup BBQ sauce

1 tbs flax oil

1 tsp Braggs Liquid Aminos

 2 cups shredded cabbage 
(or a bag of coleslaw vegetables)
 1/2 cup Veganaise
 1 tsp Dijon mustard
 1 tsp Apple Cider Vinegar
 Squeeze of lemon juice
 Salt and pepper, to taste

Additional BBQ, to taste

4 hamburger buns or rolls

In a large bowl, add the TVP and pour the boiling water. Add the 1/4 cup BBQ, flax oil, and liquid amigos. Stir together well. Set aside for 15 minutes

In another large bowl, mix together all the remaining ingredients—except the BBQ and bun— to make the coleslaw. Cover and place in the fridge to chill.

Once the TVP is rehydrated, heat a skillet over medium heat. Add the onions and TVP mixture to the skillet. Cook until the onions are translucent and the liquid is mostly gone.

Add additional BBQ to the TVP if you like for more flavor.

Time to assemble! Place a big scoop of the TVP mixture on the bottom bun, top with a big scoop of your chilled coleslaw and top with the rest of the bun.

Sweet, tangy, and satisfying! No reason you have to feel left out this summer at a BBQ.

Carrier Types

There are countless way to carry your baby. I could dedicate an entire blog just to the subject of babywearing over the ages and in different cultures. But who has time for all that? Since I get asked about babywearing and carriers a lot, I thought I would make a simple post on the most common types of carriers and provide some resources on them. Not every type of carrier is right for everyone. I LOVE wraps, but maybe you will hate how long they can to learn. So a ring sling may be your jam. Or maybe you want to skip all that fabric because it makes you hot, and go straight for a SSC. So check out the common options and think about what would work for you….

Soft Structured Carriers

Soft Structure Carriers: Think baby backpack. Most are pretty easy to use—just a few snaps and buckles. Most are pretty easy to put on alone and most an be shared between wearers easily. Most can do front, hip, and back carries. Also, most are very economic and can be worn for a long time. Note I said most….not all SSC are created equal. If you buy a $35 off eBay or at Walmart, it probably won’t be that comfortable for you or the baby. Also watch on for cheap, poorly made ones from China, they can actually break and hurt your baby. But a good SSC is amazing and pay for itself overtime. And just because you hated one brand, don’t give up!

Everyone is different and there are so many brands nowadays that odds are you can find the perfect on for your needs. Common brands are Ergo, Tula, and Beco. I personally love Action Baby, but we own a Tula since that’s my husband’s favorite.

Woven Wraps

Woven Wraps: A long piece of woven fabric that you use to secure your baby onto you. Can easily be shared between wearers, great for nursing, and can be tied in many different ways to suit your needs. Can be used for front, hip, and back carries. When tied properly, very ergonomic and comfy. However, there is a huge learning curve. It’s takes time and patience to learn how to wrap. But once you get it, it’s magic! Once you get a carry down, it is very easy to do alone (even back carries!). Then there is the whole addiction issue….you might become a total wrap junkie and own more than you can count. There are so many brands, sizes, patterns, materials, weaves, and so on. You find one you love and suddenly want to try another. Then another. And another. Soon you’ve spent a small fortune!

My dream wrap, Kokadi Kurma. It will be buried with me!

It doesn’t have to be this way though, I do know responsible people who only own one or two wraps. But it’s a fun world to get into if you can afford it. Common brands are Diddymos, Girasol, and Lenny Lamb (honestly this list could go on and on). I am a wrap girl, my two personal favorites wraps are my Girasol Tahoe and my Kokadi Kurma (both size 4).

Bei Dai/Meh Dai

Bei Dai/Meh Dai: An Asian-style carrier, sort of a mix between a SSC and wrap. Your baby sits in a like SSC, but you tie/wrap the straps like a wrap. Easy to use and much easier to learn than wrapping. Can be used for front, hip, and back carries. You can do some of fancier finishes like a wrap, but have the simplicity of SSC while putting your baby in. However, since the straps do not adjust like a SSC, it can be harder to share between wearers. And they can be harder to fit as your baby grows and might be too big for a newborn. And they come in as much variety as a wraps.

Fidella Fly Meh Dai Outer Space Blue, it’s heaven.

You can even convert a wrap into one. Common brands are Infantino Sash, and BabyHawk. I love Meh Dais for hiking, especially my Fidella Fly Meh Dai. The body panel adjusts so it can fit from newborn to toddler. And it’s sooooo cushy and soft.

Stretchy Wraps

Stretchy Wraps: A wrap made from stretchy jersey-knit fabric that you use to tie your baby onto you. Similar to a woven wrap, but with one big difference—they are NOT suitable for back carries. They should only be used for front and hip carries. Can be easily shared between wearers and very easy to put on alone. A much smaller learning curve than a woven wrap because you can pre-tie the wrap on then insert the baby. Perfect for newborns, so snuggly! And most can support a baby into toddlerhood, but it will probably be uncomfortable. The stretch makes it harder for heavier babies to stay high and the straps might dig into you. But they are a great way to start babywearing and see if you like wrapping. And they tend to be cheaper than woven wraps. Common brands are Boba and Moby. My first baby carrier was a Boba and I loved it. So snuggly and saved my sanity with a newborn.

14 - 2 — Boba Wrap in Orange, the first time I ever wrapped Jack up at one week old!

*There is an exceptions to the back carry rule. A few brands make hybrid stretchy wraps ones that can be used for back carries, such as the Wrapsody Hybrid wrap .

With a Hybrid, you can pretty much do everything you can with a stretchy wrap (like the snuggly Pocket Wrap Cross Carry) and most of the stuff you can do with a woven (like the supportive Double Hammock).

Ring Slings

15 - 3 — Lenny Lamb Heavenly Lace Large Ring Sling

Ring Slings: A piece of woven fabric with two rings attached to one end that you use to make a sling for your baby. Can be used for front, hip, and back carries. They are fairly easy to share between wearers, but since they are sized, they may not share well between two people with a big difference in size. For example, a petite wife will probably buy a small and her body-builder husband probably would want a large. They come in many colors, patterns, weaves and fabrics like woven wraps so the possibilities are endless. When picking one, watch for the quality and strength of the rings. Cheap rings run the risk of breaking and dropping your baby to the ground. Ring slings are easy to nurse in and are wonderful for newborns. Also very easy to put on alone and perfect for quick ups. There is a much smaller learning curve than woven wraps—pretty much learn how to thread the sling, place your baby correctly, and tighten. But it can get uncomfortable with a larger baby or toddler for long periods in a front or hip carry, since the weight is distributed over one side of your body. And back carries are a a bit tricky to learn, similar to woven wraps.

Sigh, the oh so beautiful Natibaby Nebula Ring Sling. I miss it.

Common brands are Maya, Sakura Bloom, and most wrap brands make them as well. To be honest, I am not that big a ring sling fan. My favorite was my Natibaby Nebula, it was so beautiful. But like I said, not all carriers are for everyone. Ring slings and I just don’t get along well, so I sold it.

Here are some wonderful links and resources for some experts:

This is a wonderful chart Wrapsody made comparing different types of carriers. Yes, it’s a biased towards their product (and it honestly is a darn good wrap). And it goes into more detail on carrier types than I do. But it shows you all the potential options in a carrier.

Wrap You In Love is a totally awesome babywearing Consultant in Germany. Her website is a wealth of knowledge. She explains different types of carriers here in great detail. And here she lists pretty much every brand of carrier I’ve ever heard.

Babywearing 102 is another wealth of knowledge. It started as a Tumblr and now is mainly a Facebook page. Both are a great resource. This babywearing glossary was SO helpful when I started started out.

And lastly, the ever wonderful Babywearing International. I recommend you find your local chapter and attend a meeting. You can borrow carriers until you find the right one for you and get advice on how to use them properly. The website is very helpful if you cannot attend a meeting.

And regardless of the type of carrier you use, please remember to follow proper babywearing procedures at all times! This nifty poster can help you remember.

And just for fun, here is montage of all these carriers!

Chocolate Mousse Parfait

Happy (late) Mother’s Day! I hope you all had a day full of love and happiness! And I hope you called your mom!

We are finally all settled in Oregon (for now at least) and I can cook again! So I made my mom a little treat. She didn’t want a big fuss, but I love her so much that she deserves something special. I just made the recipe up. It’s similar to Chocolate Mouse I made before, but with a few more easy layers. It’s simple, no baking required, and full of protein!

Chocolate Mousse Parfait

1/3 cup raw pecans
1/3 cup raw walnuts
Coconut Oil (as needed)
Pinch of salt
Dash of cinnamon
1/2 block of tofu (I used firm, but silken would be better), drained
1 medium ripe banana
1 cup chocolate chips, melted
1 cup vanilla coconut yogurt

In a food processor, add the pecans and walnuts. Grind into crumbles that pack together. Add coconut oil as needed to get it to come together. Add a pinch of salt and cinnamon for flavor.

Press nut mixture into a pan like a crust. I used a medium Pyrex bowl so you could see the layers.

Rinse out the food processor and add the tofu and banana, blend together well.

To melt the chocolate chips, add them to a microwave safe bowl and microwave them for 45 seconds. Stir and the chips should melt. If not, put it back in for 15 seconds and stir again. Repeat as needed until they are all melted.

Add the melted chocolate to the food processor and blend well.

Pour the chocolate mixture over the nut crust and smooth the top out.

Spread the yogurt over the chocolate mixture evenly.

Lastly, garnish with some nuts, if desired.

Covered and let it set-up in the fridge for at least two hours.

Then scoop out and enjoy!

It’s nothing fancy, but healthy and tasty. Make one for your momma today!

Journey Into Cloth Diapers

I have no idea why I didn’t do cloth diapers from the start. I knew all about them too. I knew they saved you money in the long run. I knew they were better for your baby’s skin. I knew they were easier on the environment. I knew they worked very well. I even knew plenty of people who used them and where to buy them. But for some reason, I just didn’t do it! No good explanation. I planned on doing many other “crunchy” mom things from the start, but somehow I missed this one. Oh well, at least now at a one-year old we are giving it a try!

I also have no good reason as to why we switched. Disposables were working fine, and we had money for them each month. He had a minor rashes develop, but nothing too bad. Just one day I thought, “Hmmm, I want some cloth diapers!” So I asked my husband, he said that’s fine, go for it.

I started by asking friends, they told me what they liked and made good suggestions. Then I found this and this awesome links on Pinterest. And the ever-so amazing All About Cloth Diapers blew my mind as well. After reading those, I had an idea of what I wanted. I decided to try All-In-Twos (AI2) and All-In-Ones (AIO). Mainly because they are the closest the disposable diapers and not too complicated to start out.

15 - 5 — Clip in or stuff liner, and go. And you can just change the liner and reuse the cover too.

I ordered 12 Alva Baby AI2, since so many people recommended that brand. The covers are nice, and some of the patterns are very cute. But the basic microfiber liners they come with didn’t cut it. Jack peed straight through it in 5 minutes and soaked everything around him.

15 - 4(1) — Microfiber clipped in with a bamboo liner on top.

So I doubled up on the liners and it was better, but only lasted an hour before soaking again. I don’t have time to change my baby every hour, so I looked into a doubler liner. I settled on charcoal bamboo liners from Amazon Prime. They work great! No leaks now at all. They are easy to wash and come out very clean. They are bit bulky with both liners in, but who doesn’t love a bubble butt? Alva Baby diapers are good diapers for a good price.

15 - 6 — Villa Babies AIO, no need for stuffing.

Then I came across an ad suggestion on Facebook for Villa Babies. Normally, I hate ad suggestions—like how they use your browser history to target things at you. I clicked it anyways, because I was bored and looking to get more diapers. The cute patterns got me right away! Bicycles, aliens, and apples-oh my goodness, so cute! Then I saw the organic ones, what I was hoping to get all along. I decided on AIOs and ordered a bundle deal of 12 plus a diaper pail liner. I didn’t realized that these diapers are handmade to order on a sewing machine by one momma, so I was kinda annoyed at first it took so long for a confirmation. But once Kellie emailed me back and I realized how small the company was, I understood. It also took awhile for them to arrive, but once they did, it was well worth it! They are sewn very well and the patterns are beyond cute!

This diaper contained the worst poop ever and his butt was still cute!

The first day came the ultimate test, Jack had an upset tummy and had a major blow-out-potential diaper. But it was all perfectly contained! I washed it 3 days later and no stains. I am very impressed with Villa Babies. My only critiques are they can leak if you leave them for more than 3 hours (which is like almost any cloth diaper). And the tabs on the sides can droop down a little bit if you don’t get the snaps just right, but it’s not that big of a deal. These are wonderful, quality diapers. They a bit more expensive, but they are worth it to me. I’m thinking of ordering a few more soon!

15 - 1(1) — His night time diapers, LLB with hemp liners.

I used these during the day and disposables at night for a month. Jack co-sleeps in a brand new king-sized bed with us. I wanted to make sure we had no leaks before I was willing to switch to cloth at night too. All three of us would not be amused to wake up soaked in pee! Once I was sure cloth was for us, I decided to order a few more diapers and liners just for nights. Everyone kept telling me about the ease of pocket diapers and how absorbent hemp is. So I ordered 6 LLB (they are made Alva Baby but a little different) pockets and 6 hemp liners off of Amazon Prime.

15 - 2(1) — Microfiber and hemp liners stuffed in the pocket.

I put them on the night they came (doubled the microfiber liners they come with a hemp liner) and it worked great! No night leaks so far at all! This is an improvement from disposables, he had a leak at least one a week.

15 - 1 — First night in clothes, fit great under his pj’s and no leaks.

The LLB covers are great, the pocket is so easy to stuff. My only complaint is that the hemp liners work so well they take awhile to dry after washing. But I guess I would rather that then not work well.

Overall, I am super happy with the switch. It’s one of those “why didn’t I do this from the start!” parenting moments. We have 30 diapers in our stash and it’s a good number for us right now. He goes through about 6-8 diapers, so I wash everything about every 3 days. I wash them separately with free and clear detergent, and either hang dry or dryer. Then I stuffed with the liners (which only takes like 20 minutes) so they are ready to use. Nothing fancy or complicated, and they can be used again for another baby.

15 - 3 — Put the pail liner we got from Villa Babies in a hamper we already had. Easy and no smell.

And to answer the question you are all probably wondering: No, cleaning the poopy diapers is not that gross. I just shake or wipe it into the toilet and flush. Then put in in the diaper pail (which does not stink either with a proper liner in it) and wash it later. You see the poop anyways when you take the diaper off, what’s another 10 seconds?

Plus, how cute is that big fluffy butt?

Jack’s First Birthday Party

A few weeks ago my son turned one-year-old, we had a big party for him! If you follow me on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram, you know that I announced a few weeks ago that we are moving to Oregon, so this party was a good-bye party as well. We didn’t quite go all-out, but we tried to make it as fun as we could on a budget. Afterall, it’s not every day your son firstborn turns one!

11150967_966590383385046_8643579670790567866_n — Wrap nap, that way he didn’t party himself out.

We decided on a longer party, lasting from 12-5pm. This way the families/babies could come earlier before naptime and the adults/singles could come later. That way everyone could come and celebrate. I was nervous about this, fearing Jack would be too excited to nap and have a meltdown. But the park was close enough to home we could bail if it went south.

The party was at my favorite park in the whole Bay Area, Alum Rock Park. It’s as off the beaten path as you can get in crowded San Jose, but popular enough that it well-cared for. Playground for the kids to play on too. The other big reason I picked it is because of the amazing hiking trails. I knew I could throw Jack in a carrier and walk him around for his nap when he got tired.

I reserved a covered structure area so people could get out of the sun and we would have a bit more privacy. It had two BBQ grills and 3 tables, plus there was a nice lawn next to it for everyone to sit in the sunshine too. I decided on a San Francisco Giants theme (similar to his babyshower). I didn’t go all out on the theme, just some black and orange decorations with some random Giants stuff we had around.

I did make these super cute baseball-themed bean bag toss games. I got the idea from Pinterest. I used a moving box we had laying around and paint left over from Jack’s nursery sign.

I was a busy mama, barely remembered to eat!

I made the bean bags too. I filled plastic sandwich bags with dry bean.Then I cut up an old baby blanket into a squares, stuffed the bean bags in, then sewed them inside using heavy duty thread. I am horrible at sewing, so anyone can do this. These were a big hit at the party. Kids and adults loved them.

As for the food, I need to give a huge thank-you to my mom, she cooked almost everything and it came out great. Most of the stuff she made was not vegan (mainly because I didn’t have time to do a big grocery shopping for the party). I just ate hot dogs and chips mainly (when I had time to eat, I spent most of the time running around). But here is vegan version of the menu with many of my own recipes:

Smoked Ribs
Hot Dogs
Baked Beans
Coleslaw
Hawaiian Mac Salad
Garden Salad
Spinach Dip and Carrots
Chips and Salsa (but try making my Guacamole too)

We did a cake smash too. My mom and I were going to make Jack a small cake to smash and then cupcake for everyone…. but we ran out of time and got a Costco cake. We cut him off a big piece to destroy, then served up the rest.

Now, I know store bought cakes are pretty much all lard and processed sugar, not the best thing for a baby. But I do believe that treats (even horrible ones) can slide if eaten very rarely. Plus, Jack didn’t eat that much of it, mostly just played with it.

The party was so much fun, huge success! It was low key, and just enough people came to make it a good time. It was lovely to have so many friends and family come celebrate Jack’s first year of life and send off to Oregon. I hope we looks back at pictures from this day and always remember his home in San Jose and how loved he truly is.All that being said, it was a lot of work and this kid ain’t getting another big party for a long time! 😛

Vegan Parenting

I am a vegan. I am a parent. Does that make me a vegan parent? It sure does! Hence the name of this blog.

Jack does not exclusively eat a vegan diet. This was a compromise between my husband and I (see here). But since I am his primary caregiver, he eats a lot of vegan meals with me. One of his favorite meals is my Dhal and Aloo Mattar. But veganism is a complete lifestyle, going vegan chances many aspects of your life besides just diet. So, the other day this lead me to think about just what does being a vegan parent mean? How does veganism affect they way I raise my son?

"Why do you keep telling me eggs from chickens?" — “Why do you keep telling me eggs from chickens?”

Before Jack was born, Michael and I discussed the major parenting choices like punishments and sex education. This lead me to think about what kind of parents we would be, so I looked up parenting styles.Oh boy, there are a lot! And there are some very strong opinions out there (the whole Tiger Mom controversy). I was overwhelmed and kind of turn off by the whole idea of defining the care of my child in such blunt terms.

So I asked myself what values that my husband and I both share do I want him to learn? After some soul searching, I came to that we want to teach him compassion, understanding, and patience. I also want encourage our love of science, nature, and education. Then I realized I kind of gave a broad definition of what vegans stand for overall. Compassion towards all living things! And to understand such ideas, you need to know science and nature—which is done through education.

After searching the web and reading a bunch of articles, I found this one from She Knows Parenting the easiest to follow with great definitions. The article lists 5 main styles:

Instinctive: Based on the way you were bought up, following your parents’ example. Trusting your instincts that you know what is right for your child.
Attachment: Focused on creating a deep emotional bond and encouraging them to express their feelings. Some see it as a holistic parenting approach.
Helicopter: Being deeply involved in every aspect of the child’s life. Overseeing and sometimes controlling their actions and experiences. Know to shielding and prevent all obstacles from ever even reaching their child.
Authoritative: Clear and direct rules and expectations. And if they are not obeyed, direct consequences will be enforced. However, the rules are usually fair and are in place to protect the child’s development. Are nurturing when need.
Permissive: Letting the child be who they are with little rules and expectations. Very open, non-confrontational, and nurturing. Based on the idea that children do not have the mental capacity to understand maturity and responsibility.

But without a baby, we had no idea what kind of parents we would be. Like I said, I was not going to pigeonhole myself, so I read read over those options with skepticism. Nothing clicked. Instrictive kind of sound nice, we both had nice childhoods, maybe just did what our parents did? Overall those were all just words and abstract idea. We needed a baby in front of us and to figure out what worked for us.

Once Jack arrived, I slowly fell more and more into attachment parenting without even realizing it. I just did what made sense for our family. I decided to exclusively breastfeeding for the health benefits and to save money. Then I bought a baby carrier (and later many more), since Jack wanted to be held all the time and I want free hands on occassion.This lead to me attending (and later becoming a member) of both La Leche League and Babywearing International meetings. Extended breastfeeding and babywearing are two huge aspects of attachment parenting, so these groups naturally led towards other attachment ideas. Now we embrace co-sleeping, baby-led weaning, gentle discipline. And last week we started on cloth diapers. So here I am one year in, an attachment parent by accident. Michael is on board with all of it too. He sees how happy and healthy Jack is, so he has no complaints

IMG_2645 (1) — Attached daddy wearing his son for a daytrip to Napa, melts my heart!.

What does attachment parenting have to do with veganism? Well, it stresses compassion and understanding of your child. Hopefully one day he will spread this idea of ever-encompassing love towards every living thing on the planet.

10409709_10101649074069256_3753505971690499749_n — Jack LOVES animals so far. Especially our cats. This was the first time he pulled himself up, to pet Zoey!

I am trying very hard to explain veganism to him a simple and non-invasive way right now. Right now the greatest thing I can do is treat him animal compassion. I show him every animal we come across and explain why it matters to the planet. For example, “See the duck on the pond, Jack? It says quack quack. Ducky eats the plants and algae in the water to help keep the pond healthy. See her little ducklings following her? She takes care of them like I care for you.” That way the duck is something is way more than a restaurant menu item to him. I want him to understand why that duck and all over ducks matter.

"Yeah yeah, the dhal is made from lentils that come from plants...thanks mom..." — “Yeah yeah, the dhal is made from lentils that come from plants…thanks mom…”

Then there is the dietary stuff as well. When he eats lentils, I tell him those came from a plant. When he eats cheese, I tell him that is made from a mama cow’s milk, like the milk you get from mommy. When he eats meat, I tell him that is from the body of an animal.

This is exclusive to being vegan or attachment parenting? No, you can meat-loving attached parent or a vegan tiger mom. Nothing wrong with either one! But overall, attachment parents and veganism share a lot of the same ideals.

Overtime I will explain more and more why I do not eat animals and why daddy does. I will never force him to be vegan, it will be his choice. I hope one day he does decide to go vegan. But overall I hope he always leads a life full of compassion and always seeks out knowledge, the true vegan spirit.

A Letter To My Son

Dear Jack,

My sweet little prince, you are one-year old now. One year ago, you entered this world and made me a mother. I will never forget that beautiful moment when they placed you on my chest. One year ago, you made us a family and our love multiplied. I didn’t even know what was possible. One year ago you changed everything and anything we thought we knew about love, life, and happiness. Our world is now a more beautiful place.

One year of breastfeeding, with all its struggles and joys so you could be nourished body and soul. One year of babywearing, countless wraps and carries tried all to make you feel safe and secure. One year of countless sleepless nights filled with kisses and hugs to help you fall back asleep. One year of trial and error—tears and struggles—all in hopes of giving you the best life possible.

You have changed so much this first year. Once you just cried and cried, and I had to guess in vain what would make you happy. Now you talk and sign your needs with ease. Once I had to carry and hold you everywhere. Now you walk and crawl with gusto. Once my breasts were your only source of sustaince. Now you can feed yourself any food you like.

You are no longer a baby. I am sad your infancy is over and will cherish this past year more than you will ever understand. Now, you begin a new phase. You are a little man who is ready to explore and discover. I’m so excited to guide you along this journey and watch you find your place in life.

Along the way, please remember I am always here for you. Although you are no longer a baby, you will always be my baby. Just like as a newborn, I will give up anything I can to help you. Although I no longer carry you on my chest, I will always carry you in my heart.

Love always,

Your Mother